


To Pick a Pumpkin Perfectly Pristine

by Plagg



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 13:45:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16833799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plagg/pseuds/Plagg
Summary: Patton, Virgil, Logan, and Roman go pumpkin picking





	To Pick a Pumpkin Perfectly Pristine

Ah, the pumpkin patch. In the mind palace, that meant sprawling pumpkins and other gourds of so many different unnatural colors. The colors were Patton and Roman’s idea, neither wanting to give up on the idea of blue or red pumpkins. Virgil grew rather fond of the black and purple pumpkins, but Logan clung to normal orange and white ones.

The reason for the four’s trip to this colorful place was simple: Patton wanted to carve pumpkins and Logan, ever the one with a sweet tooth, wanted homemade pumpkin cake.

“Ooh, what about this one, Verge?” Patton let go of the anxious side’s hand and stooped down to pick up a pink pumpkin. “It’s the perfect shape for a kitty or puppy design!”

Virgil snickered and squatted beside the moral side, pointing to another pumpkin not too far away. “How ‘bout that one? It’s purple and it’s long. We could make it a ghost,” he said as he rested his head on top of Patton’s shoulder. Patton snickered and pressed a kiss to his temple before disturbing Virgil’s comfortable position to grab the pumpkin. “I like it! It could be really spooky!”

“We are not bringing a _teal_ pumpkin home, Roman!” Patton and Virgil swiveled around at the sound of Logan’s fussing, neither denying their curiosity.

“And why not? It’ll match your tie!” Roman reasoned, reaching over to gently tug Logan closer by his tie. 

“It’s unnatural! Who knows what that does to it?!”

Roman rolled his eyes and tucked his choice of pumpkin under his arm. “Well, we could _always_ get you a pie pumpkin, but _I’m_ getting this one!” The solution seemed to please Logan, who simply buried his face in the prince’s shoulder, arms crossed. 

“Hey, you two have your carving pumpkin picked out?” Patton asked, standing up with the big purple gourd tucked under his arm. The excitement on Patton’s face stayed ever present as the moral side practically buzzed in place. Virgil snickered and hid his face in the other’s cardigan.

“I suppose,” Roman said, giving his teal pumpkin a pat. The sides went to find pie pumpkins, then, listening to Logan fuss about how he didn’t _want that green one, Virgil put it down!_ Roman snatched up Logan’s hand when he started to point, pressing a chaste kiss to the knuckles just to calm the logical side down. With armfuls of pumpkins, they all headed home.

* * *

Everyone knew that the only reason you have newspaper anymore is for catching pumpkin guts. Well, everyone but Logan, who insisted they only use the sports sections and the comics. They sat the pumpkins down on the table, Patton and Logan letting Virgil and Roman take chairs to draw on their frightening(ly fun) designs.

“What are we doing, Pat?” Virgil asked, sharpie poised and ready in his left hand. “Ghost?”

“ _Yeah_ , maybe give it a top hat!” Patton added, pressing onto the back of the chair. “Yeah, like that! Ooh, can it have a monocle?!” Virgil snickered and nodded, adding in the details. It was a simple design, but he had a feeling simple would be better.

“What about Jack Skellington?” Roman suggested.

“It’s not the right size,” Logan said, moving the pumpkin around to make sure none of the sides could serve for the design Roman wanted. “You could possibly do a spider?”

“NO!”

“Don’t worry, Padre, I wouldn’t dream of it!”

“Alright, what about a witch? Dragon?”

Roman gave him a glare, huffing at the smirk on Logan’s face. “How about just an image of the ocean? Hmmm?”

“Fair point. We could have a traditional jack-o-lantern, then?”

“ _Ugh_! That’s so _boring_!” Roman tossed himself back in his seat. He saw how Virgil was already drawing, and determination filled him quickly. “What about – shut up, I have an idea!”

“I wasn’t saying anything anyw-“ Logan paused when he saw the design Roman created. “Satisfactory.”

* * *

The couples cut open their pumpkins and started scooping out the insides. Patton and Virgil made very clear that they enjoyed the pumpkin guts, reaching in with their bare hands and tossing seeds and seed-strands at each other. Roman and Logan were much more careful, either one gagging at the sight of the brains of their precious pumpkin. 

It didn’t help that the insides were not orange, rather they were just a slightly darker color of the outside of their pumpkins. 

“Agh, it’s on my elbow! Logan! Logan, get it off my elbow!”

“Calm down!” Logan grabbed the seed clung to Princey’s arm, throwing it across the table towards the other two.

“Contaminator!” Virgil shouted, tossing purple pumpkin brains at Logan.

“Hey!”

“Hay’s for horses; straw’s cheaper!” Patton said with a giggle.

“This is _disgusting_!” Roman shouted.

“ _You’re_ disgusting,” Virgil countered. Roman ignored him, instead running off to the laundry room to find yard gloves. He needed a shower.

* * *

A few more tantrums, seed accidents, and a couple of pumpkin puns later, the jack-o-lanterns were complete. Finally, time for the big reveals!

“You two go first,” Roman insisted, gesturing for Virgil and Patton to turn their pumpkin around. 

The ghost was incredibly cute. Its top hat sat tilted on its head, and the monocle over its eyes definitely screamed that Patton helped with this project. The wispy tail and circle-arms added even more charm to the design, and neither Roman nor Logan could hold back their “awwww”s.

Virgil squirmed under their “scrutiny”, turning their pumpkin back around. “You’re turn.”

“Feast your eyes on the best pumpkin _ever_!” Roman turned their pumpkin around as quickly as he could, pride ever present in the smirk on his face. A ghoulish mummy head, complete with slivers cut out and shavings taken to create a bandage effect, creeped up from the bottom of the pumpkin. One bony hand, intricately carved by Logan, reached into the air and seemed to grab for the stem of the pumpkin. 

Patton and Virgil couldn’t help the shocked looks on their faces, and Patton couldn’t hold in his own gasp. “It’s _gourd_ -eous!” He grinned through the glare Logan shot him, proud of his own pun. 

“I didn’t think you two could actually make something _that_ cool,” Virgil said. It was as close to a compliment as Roman could expect.

“I supposed that makes pocket-protector and I the _best_ couple, then!” Roman said proudly.

“Who says?!” Virgil spat.

“Our pumpkin,” Roman said simply, pulling Logan down by his tie to place a kiss on his lips. 

Patton giggled and wrapped his arms around Virgil’s shoulders. “Cheer up; we’ll beat ‘em at Christmas with the tree decorating contest!” he said, quickly pressing a wet kiss to Virgil’s cheek. Virgil crossed his arms and puffed his cheeks, bringing his feet up in his chair and leaning against Patton in his pout. 

“We better beat them…”


End file.
